The Sounds of Silence

I posted my blog in several Facebook groups that I am a part of, and an important question was brought up that frankly stumped me. The question was how do we keep an open dialogue going about addiction so that this doesn't continue to happen to friends and loved ones? The key word in that question is dialogue. The website dictionary.com has many definitions about what the word dialogue means. The one that stood out to me was, "An exchange of ideas or opinions on a particular issue, especially a political or religious issue, with a view to reaching an amicable agreement or settlement." I agree with the definition, but I would also add that a dialogue involves actively listening to the other person to truly hear what he/she has to say versus listening/waiting for them to be done so they can respond. I am finding that the older I get (I am sounding like my mom and dad...not a bad thing!) the less people truly listen to understand. They listen so they can jump in with their opinion/viewpoint that they believe to be the truth. I was perusing Facebook and saw this fabulous cover of Simon and Garfunkel's hit song "The Sound of Silence". Give the video a quick watch, you won't regret it! 

The line that I keep hearing over and over again was the one that goes "People hearing without listening" That simple line speaks volumes to me with the stigma of addiction as well as just where our society is as a whole right now. For the record, this is solely my opinion as I continue to reflect on the stigma of addiction and how we can begin to change it. So many people watched the video of the teacher doing cocaine during her plan period, but were they really listening and watching? Sometimes we have to listen to what is not being said. Did you notice her hands shaking? Did you hear her silent cry for help? That was a human being in need of compassion and kindness. I am not advocating, nor have I ever advocated for enabling an addict or giving them a get out of jail free card. What I am advocating for is listening to their story. Why did they begin their battle with addiction?  How did they score their first high?  Are they in pain? What is their story? What are they not saying? Listen and look for the answers. Listen without responding.  This isn't going to solve all of our country's problems with addiction, but I believe wholeheartedly that it is a step in the right direction.  And to the person who asked me the question about how do we keep this dialogue going, thank you! Thank you for stretching me out of my comfort zone and making me examine my own thoughts that I was not even aware of.  It is through having difficult conversations and truly listening that we will slowly be able to uncover some of the answers and come up with more difficult questions.  I don't believe we get magical answers from having difficult conversations but rather better questions. I firmly believe that we can begin to solve this epidemic together by asking questions, truly listening, and asking better questions. Thank you for reading! Your feedback is very important to me, so feel free to leave any feedback you have. Just remember to be respectful!